Controversial I know but hear me out. We’re all tired, and to some degree, burnt out from daily expectations. We have commitments to jobs, family, friends, and extra-curricular activities. Over the past 5-10 years there has been significant attention towards this concept of “self-care.”
There are endless google results, trending hashtags, and tiktoks devoted to this. Bubble baths, massages, face masks, knitting, or binge watching your favorite streaming show…it is literally endless. While all of these are wonderful activities (if they’re up your alley), not only are they short term solutions to a larger problem, they fail to address the root causes of stress and burnout. We can’t alleviate stress and restore balance with all of the societal pressures and expectations we face by slapping on a face mask.
We’re under pressure to consistently perform and achieve which creates a disconnect from the desire to go for a 3 hour hike in the middle of the day; an activity that may nourish your soul. If we go for a hike, we miss work, if we miss work, we risk termination, if we are terminated, we can’t pay the bills. This creates an imbalance between our personal and professional lives.
To truly prioritize self-care, we need to challenge these societal expectations and cultivate a culture that values well-being and balance over excessive productivity. This is a very privileged mindset since like I said, we need money to pay the bills, and setting boundaries can be risky.
So how can we set boundaries that establish and maintain positive mental, emotional, and physical health? It requires saying “no” and communicating our needs effectively. At work this could look like setting, and sticking to, clear work hours. It means saying no to taking on extra responsibilities that are outside the scope of your role. I’ve heard from so many friends that their work environment culture is to respond to emails as quickly as possible, creating discontent at home as they’re responding to emails during family dinner. Yet interestingly enough, not one person I’ve spoken to has been reprimanded for not responding quickly enough.
In our family, friend, or personal relationships, we can communicate our limits and negotiate time for ourselves, whether it’s carving out dedicated relaxation time or engaging in activities that bring us joy by ourselves or with our loved ones. By setting boundaries, we reclaim control over our lives and create space for genuine self-care that addresses our holistic well-being.
I know this is easier said than done. I’m talking about reshaping societal expectations and tackling systemic change, which doesn’t happen overnight. Chances are if you’re at work reading this, there is someone within a 20 foot vicinity who also wants to say “no” and leave the office on time. Finding like minded people can help you set boundaries. Know that you might hurt a friend or family member’s feelings by RSVP’ing “no” to an event. Like I said, this is hard but you matter. Setting boundaries is THE essential aspect of self-care, allowing us to create space for rest, rejuvenation, and personal growth.
Check out my next post diving more into boundaries.
